waiting for a miracle

Another Miracle due in July 2019

on January 18, 2019

Scott and I, along with Jeremiah, Zazu and Sophie have some exciting news. We’re adding to our family!

Before you ask, we’ve already got some answers below:

1- was if Ivf? We have kept things close this time and would prefer not to answer this question at this time. Please respect our wishes. Guess if you want, you’ve got a 50% chance either way, but we won’t be answering just yet.

2 – will you find out the gender? Probably not. We’d like a ‘normal’ pregnancy. Everything is so clinical with pregnancy so we’d like to keep an element of surprise. So you will probably hear us referring to the miracle in my belly as he, she, they, them. It’s kind of fun having no medical idea what gender we’ve got in there.

3 – how many weeks are you? 12 weeks, and no we don’t believe in that stupid 12 week rule. We would have announced earlier but we needed to do some things first.

4 – how am I feeling? Rotten. Haha. I’ve had terrible morning sickness but worse than that – I’ve been in a bad Crohns flare for the last 12 weeks. (Think terrible stomach pains, stuck in bed then stuck on the loo, then running to the loo not sure if you’ll make it, lots and lots of blood loss, yeah it ain’t pretty.) I’ve lost a lot of blood and 4kgs. I’ve been in hospital having some unpleasant procedures. I’m on so much daily medication and it’s not all just a simple pill to swallow. Most of it is really intrusive and time consuming. Scott has been keeping this family together. I’ve been on a lot of bed rest and he’s been cooking, cleaning, looking after Jeremiah, trying to sort the house, trying to kept the gardens maintained to avoid snakes, looking after me, looking after the dogs etc. Things that we’d normally share some of the load, he’s been doing it all as best that he can.

5 – How’s the baby? So far everything is going well but we are cautiously optimistic. I’ve had some spotting earlier and that’s absolutely terrifying. That’s never ended well for us so we are still quite scared. Gods in control and guiding us so we trust Him.

6 – How’s your back going to hold up? I have no idea. All I can do is try my best. We can’t foresee the future and adding to our family is so important to all of us. I have early onset osteoporosis so if I don’t have a baby now, we will probably never be able to have one again. Check your bones ladies – there’s this thing about pregnancy and breastfeeding. It does all sorts of things to your bones. I developed osteoporosis from pregnancy and breastfeeding last time. If you’ve had a fracture, please get a bone density test done.

7 – I probably won’t talk about the pregnancy in person. It makes me feel awkward. When you’ve had more losses than you’ve had success, pregnancy is the scariest thing in the world. Every trip to the loo I’m checking for clear or blood. The entire pregnancy last time was scary and this one is even more scary with all of my serious health issues. So you probably won’t hear me talk about it. Scott will. It’s different when it’s not happening to your body. Maybe one day I’ll say the P word (pregnant) without such a struggle. And I reiterated I’m feeling so crap. So if I’m talking to you, I’m also probably trying not to throw up on you.

8 – Our main problem has always been carrying a baby to term. The getting pregnant part is the easier part. It’s the staying pregnant part that is scary. If you’d be willing, we’d appreciate any prayers for a safe and healthy pregnancy to term.

9 – when are you due? July 31st but we all know babies come when they are ready so who knows? Late July sometime.

10 – working with a toddler and dogs to get a photo isn’t easy. Haha. Hope you get a giggle out of our “best of” photos with our boy and our girls.

We’d like to give you some insight into our lives and why we felt the need to share those questions and answers above.

We never dreamed that it would take us 7 years and 6 miscarriages (babies we’d already grown to love, plans we’d made for them) to finally get our boy Jeremiah. No one dreams of heartache and intrusive, often painful daily medical procedures to get pregnant. It’s not the fairytale to have a baby.

We decided to share openly about the processes involved to bring awareness. (If you’ve got Netflix, check out Friends From College – the ivf scenes. The only show I’ve ever seen to do justice to ivf. I had tears watching it.) We were very open about everything so that others could understand *some* of the ups and downs of ivf. We also shared for others going through the process.

Anyone we’ve told about this pregnancy, the first thing they say is “was it ivf?” It’s an intrusive question and even though we hold you all dearly and we know the intentions are from a place of genuine interest, if we wanted to talk about conception, we would. Think, would you ask this question to any other pregnant friends? If the answer’s no, then please hold on to that question – we might just answer it in the coming months but for now, we want some normalcy. We’d love to know what a ‘normal’ pregnancy is like. (If that’s been you who has asked “was it Ivf?” – this has been interesting for us. There’s only been one or two people who haven’t asked this. So you don’t need to apologise or be offended, just take on our perspective and perhaps another couple won’t be asked this by literally every one of their close friends. Let’s celebrate a baby like you would any other.)

We’d like to end this with a huge THANK YOU for not asking those questions. You know the ones I’ve mentioned on our very first ever blog post. The ones about when are we having another or if we are going to have another. Thank you. Sincerely thank you for listening to the heart of couples (and singles) trying (or not trying) to have a baby. I’ve been so incredibly grateful and impressed that not one person has asked those questions. Thank you! Clearly we wanted another and we didn’t have to dodge those questions or think up witty responses. Thank you!

And lastly, but most importantly, praise to God for this precious miracle, and for bringing us this far. There have been some scares and hospital visits but through the grace of God, He has stood beside us, gone before us and carried us when needed. Through Him, all things work together for good. He knows the plans and purpose for our lives, and He listens when we simply call upon Him. (Jeremiah 29 v11-14 brings us renewed hope daily.)


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